The Vapors

I recently read that a movie was being made about the legendary Juice Crew, with Cuba Gooding Jr. as Marley Marl.

How you like them apples? I fucking love'em. Here's a little Biz Markie to hold you over.

Meet Claude Van Damme and beat the August heat

For those of you looking for a distraction as the smoldering summer hits it's final stretch, get your Netflix queue ready and spend a little time with the guys and gals from Farmington.

If you're the proud recipient of the FX channel, its safe to assume you've at least heard of 'The Shield'. Debuting in the spring of '2002', 'The Shield' was FX Networks first foray into original programming. The first season was a critical success and paved the way for other critically acclaimed FX shows such as Niptuck, Rescue Me, and The Riches.

In the vein of 'Training Day', the plot revolves around a team of less than ethical L.A. police officers. For the first fifty minutes of the pilot, you may think you've figured the show out. 'OK, so this guy is a cop that doesn't operate within the rules, but he is effective... blah, blah, bliggity blah'. It's in the last ten minutes that the true direction and tone of the show is revealed to you, setting the stage for everything that follows.

Despite the fact the Bill O'Reilly once admitted 'The Shield' was one of his favorite shows on television, I still highly recommend it. It's a slow burn that will consume you, and you will shat your pants.

OK, I've said enough... if you get started now you can catch the final 7th season as it returns on September 2nd. The seasons are short, and while it will be tight, it's a great way to beat the August heat!

Gatorades, Little Debbies, BBQ Sauce, and Lottery Tickets

Every neighborhood should have it's own little market, a place to go when you need just that one thing. Should it be a bottled Coke, some 'Snap-It's', Yoo Hoo, or a cork remover, every neighborhood needs it's own center of their little galaxy. Here in our humble and often forgotten 'Boscobel Heights' East Nashville community, guarding the 19th block like those dogs from Ghostbusters guarded Gozer, is our shining star. 'Rick's Market - Coldest Beer In Town - Picnic Supplies'.

I have to be honest, it took me awhile to embrace Rick's when I first moved to this great neighborhood. It was such a stark change from the Belmont-Hillsboro Circle K where many a great ICEE partied partied in my tummy tummy. I'd say it was about a year and a half before I made the short trip up the hill and ventured through the doors off what would become an integral part of my East Nashville lifestyle. I was admittedly nervous. I could picture a similar type of incident that occurred to Pee Wee Herman in 'Pee Wee's Big Adventure', when he went in the biker bar and had to save his ass by dancing on a table to 'Tequila'. Or like when Fletch had to pretend to be Harley Davidson himself in 'Fletch Lives' to avoid an impending ass-whooping. With the exception of one time when my ringer (which is 'Goonies are Good Enough' by Cindi Lauper) went off in the middle of Rick's, have a ever been a little afraid. I just yelled "sweet potatoes taste better with oregano!" and took off running.

Anyway, my first trip to Rick's was just before the Panther's vs. Patriot's Super Bowl. You know, 'Boobgate'. We just needed a tad more BBQ sauce and there was no time to go anywhere else. A debate ensued, and in the end the decision was made that it was time to make that march. A friend graciously escorted me to and from the premises. It was like going home, a home that you really never wanted, but needed. Now, if I need a Skor bar during halftime of the Sunday game... well you might just see a flash of a guy that looks like a woman, wearing a sweatshirt as pants running up the street.

With that being said, July 12th was Costumer Appreciation Day at Rick's. Their way of saying thanks for 10 years of loyal costumer service. In turn, I want to take this opportunity to thank you Rick, for all the Gatorades, Little Debbies, BBQ sauce, and Lottery Tickets that you've provided over the years.

Now, if I can just get you to carry Naked Juice. We'll get there... together.

"what the hell I'm listening to and why"

The Avett Brothers - The Gleam
(2006) Ramseur Records





I've had the honor of sharing the bill with this band on a few occasions. To be completely honest, I never quite knew how I felt about them. The live show was absolutely incredible, but the next day all I would have left is a CD that didn't quite connect with. That is until their most recent release 'Emotionalism' came out last year. For me that album captured something just as uniquely special on tape as their live show had been doing over the past few years.

With that said, I was given the gift of 'The Gleem' a few weeks ago by a friend. A six song EP that had unfortunately slipped under my radar.

Two words. 'Absolutely Perfect'. This CD is 'absolutely perfect'.



Dervish - Travelling Show
(2007)



I first heard this band somewhere on the road in Kansas. I was on tour with a group and the 'Live In Palma' album seemed stuck in the CD player for those few weeks. It would be a year later when I first saw this band at a place called the Livery in Goderich, Ontario. It was one of the most captivating performances I've ever seen, and the band has been a favorite of mine ever since.

The stoicism of the band is countered by the almost mystical energy of vocalist Cathy Jordan. The soulfulness and beauty of her voice easily make her one of my favorite singers.

While 'Travelling Show' doesn't capture the atmosphere of 'Spirit', or the full on energy of 'Midsummer's Night', I have to say that it's great to have new music from Dervish. Like the previous album 'Spirit', the band experiments ever so slightly with broadening their traditional sound. It's so beautifully subtle that you may just miss it.

Caroline Herring - Lantana
(2008) Signature Sounds



Seriously, why the hell do I like this album? I can think of three reasons right off the bat to hate this record. So, why can't I stop listening?

The opening cut 'Stone Cold World' is such a great way to start the album. There is just a rawness and aching beauty to this record that won't let me push stop on the ipod. Damn it.

Flank 2 Position, therefore, such as... the Louis Gossett Jr.

Note: I support the WGA strike and this blog in no way represents a lack of support for the writers... you folks need to get piznad.

All this week I have felt an emptiness, a void down deep. I've felt confused and lonely and for some reason I have developed what looks to be a mullet. I tried to distract myself by pretending to be Tom Brady, which really does help, and I've very much been looking forward to the wonderful weekend of divisional playoffs. Yet, something doesn't feel right... something is missing. What could it be... (tick, tock, tick, tock). Then it hits me, like a lamp cord tied to my nipple.

In the past few years I have gravitated back to the magic of television. Not since lions changed into a large ass robots and Courtney Cox had special mind powers (in the short lived but long remembered Misfits of Science) has there been such quality on television. I said quality, not quantity. Anyway, playoffs not only signal the end of football season - no, it's a beginning - a beginning of a new season of 24.... but not this year.

Now look, not that I give a damn - not after that shit sandwich I ate last year called season 6. If they had just left it at that... fine, but no, on October 25th, 2007 FOX released the trailer for the upcoming season 7. As the preview begins, I admit, I start to tingle just a bit. Then it happens... I'm not sure how it happens, but somehow it does - 'Soul Patch Jesus' has indeed returned, and snap - he's a bad guy.

What a wonderfully ballsy move by FOX. It makes perfect sense. You see to me, Tony never really died because seasons 5 and 6 only exist in a parallel universe or dimension. The same place where Coy and Vance are the real Duke boys, Highlander 2 fits between 1 and 3, and the Joel Schumacher Batman movies are the flagship of the franchise. I mean, some people think cucumbers taste better pickled. What? Huh? What? Huh?

Look, it all comes down to two words, Michelle Dessler. She came kung fu kicking her way into my heart in season 3 all the while managing to fend off a virus that eats your internal organs. Now you want me to accept that she got killed (off camera) trying to crank her 1998 Jeep Grand Cherokee. Hell no man... that's a pill I cannot swallow. What's next? You're going to try and tell me that there's a new Knight Rider where David Hasslehoff's offspring drives KITT, who is now a mustang and the voice of Will Arnett from Arrested Development. What? Huh?

Regardless, the return of Tony has given me something to be excited about... anything is possible now, right? I predict that before the end of the day a lady with four fingers and an eye patch, smelling oddly of vinegar returns claiming to be Nina. Much like the Black Knight from Monty Python and the Holy Grail she will insist it 'twas but a flesh wound'.

Unfortunately though, only weeks after dropping the Tony nugget - 24 has been postponed, indefinitely.

So, here we are… it's Sunday night and the only thing I'm left with is a bag of pizza rolls, some sort of flu like symptoms, and Iron Eagle is just beginning to play on AMC. In addition, Terrell Owens is wearing Members Only jacket, crying, and saying something about being on a team.

The world may indeed be coming to an end…